scout, I miss you

Scout is 19.  She is a long, long way away at college.  Too far for tea together on Sunday afternoons sometimes.  Which isn't much hardship for Scout because she usually only drinks water and occasionally chocolate milk out of cartons in the out-of-doors.  She will forever be my apple cheeked cutie pie.  If you could hear her laugh, you would love her forever.  She giggles like a six year old and sings like the prettiest music box you've ever heard.

Scout enjoys feeling whatever is to be felt at top volume.  She gets that from me.  Sorry, Scout.  Sad is soooo saaad.  Happy is over the moon.  She might have made an excellent Jewish princess, except she is far too blond.

She is liking college except when she doesn't, and then everything is very bad.  Like tonight when I talked to her while I was shopping.  That is so outrageously not what I do, but it was a choice between talking at home where all the jokes are really loud.  Or being rude and antisocial in a store talking on my cell phone.  But I did apologize to the till boy, who said he understood and then I felt much better.

She sighed a lot tonight, and that is hard for me because she just needs a hug and a good cry and I'm not there.   She was terribly, terribly sad, but I know her well enough to know that tomorrow she will be a singing, laughing apple cheeked cutie pie.

It is hard to be a mama.

I highly recommend it.