dead and almost dead

I while back, not too long after Rosebud was born, in fact just a four weeks after she was born, I got a disease.  It was a rare disease or condition called an intussusception. If curiosity should get the better of you and you click on the handy link provided to find out what that means, you'll notice in the cryptic description of intussusception it says that With prompt attention, intussusception can often be successfully treated without lasting problems.  What it does not tell you is what happens without prompt attention.  Without prompt attention,  intussusception is likely to be fatal.

In my case, it was not fatal.  This was not because the condition received prompt attention, because it didn't.  Nobody is really certain why it was not fatal, but I am pretty sure that God just wasn't finished with me yet. Without elaborating a great deal at this moment on my illness, what I will say is this.  I learned one of the most important lessons of my life.  When you are dying, you think a lot about dying and about living and what the difference really is between the two.

And it seems like there isn't all that much difference.  But then when you live through it all, you discover that there is, in fact, a massive difference between actually dying and almost dying.  It is completely different to wake up from a surgery and think, I Am Alive.  Than it is to not wake up and think, I Am Dead. 

Understanding that you are likely to die, and then not dying makes you think I Have More Time.  I have more time to get it right.  I have more time to love God.  I have more time to get holy.  I have more time on this good earth to make my way to God's good heaven.